Dear Pastor,

I always admire the way you answer the letters in your column. I have a boyfriend who is 30 years old. He has two children. I am 24 years old and I am working. We are living together.

Every evening when I come home, he is always questioning me about what happen at work and where I went after work. He knew that I had a boyfriend before I met him, but the guy and I broke up. He was a policeman. One day my boyfriend and I were quarrelling and I told him that I would always love my ex-boyfriend and he can't walk in the policeman's shoes. He told me to come out of his house, so I started to pack my things. Then he said that he was sorry for what he said and I told him I was sorry for what I said too.

Pastor, something is wrong with him because I caught him smelling my panties twice after I put them in the dirty-clothes basket. I am not doing anything that could cause him to smell my underwear. I am thinking of leaving him. Every time he has to give me money, it is a fuss. He is mean, but not very mean.

I don't know what to do about him.


Dear W.A.,

There are many reasons why this man might be smelling your underwear. He might feel insecure and he wants to find out whether you have been with another man. Perhaps he is carrying out a fetish behaviour. Perhaps he is sexually aroused by the smell of your underwear. Some men are sexually aroused by body smell while there are others who love to put their fingers in a woman's vagina and smell it.

You might be surprised to know that some men fetish is to have sex with their women while the women are asleep. That is the only way they can maintain an erection. Some men who have sex with women while they are asleep call the act, 'stealing piece'.

Some men have foot and shoe fetish. They always sniff at their women's shoes or feet.

Whatever might be happening to your boyfriend, you should encourage him to go and see a family counsellor or psychologist. If he refuses to go, you should part company because he will always accuse you of having another man while you are with him.


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Some men are jus sick inna dem head pastor...Dont be afraid to tell her that....Plain and simple.....


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